Hello lovely friends. It has been a hot second since I’ve come to you to share in my current writing triumphs (and setbacks) and for that I am incredibly sorry.

I was on a roll throughout the month of April, just plugging away at both my manuscript’s word count goal AND in sharing the progress with you here. Then I realized that I was getting overwhelmed with trying to juggle it all and decided to take a step back from sharing progress in the same way. Instead, I promised to keep you updated once monthly, which I both did and did not do. I did put together monthly updates, but I forgot to share them with you here–whoops!

Why don’t we dive right on in to what’s been happening over the months of May and June as well as what July’s plans are already shaping out to be, eh?

May Updates

So in May, I somehow, accidentally, serendipitously managed to finish the first draft of the first part of my manuscript. 😳

Yeah. That happened.

And to be completely honest, I’ve not quite managed to fully accept or process that information yet, a full two months later. I can’t even wrap my head around the fact that that happened two months ago already. It feels like I just just finished.

Now, you may have caught that I said that I completed the “first draft of the first part” of my manuscript, but what does that even mean? Well, funny you should ask. . .

Basically, Throughout the month of May, I realized that this particular book was at a cross roads and could become one of two things: a duology or a massive, 800 page story akin to Anna Karenina. But the further along the story I got, the more and more it began to feel more suited for a duology. And so in finishing the “first draft of the first part”, I’ve basically finished book #1. But instead of stopping to celebrate that accomplishment, cheers-ing myself for 6 months and 155K words worth of work, I got up the very next day and dove right on in to book #2 (more on that below).

If you’d like to witness the whole up and down affair I had throughout the writing process for May, I actually put together a little vlog for you below. In it, I take solo coffee dates, have a slight medical fright (that turns out ok), soothe myself with a bit of thrifting, and ultimately write somewhere between 28K words and 35K words (the exact total is still a mystery to me because of how I track my word count goals).

June Updates

Now, heading into June, things were already starting out suuupppeeerrr slowly. Probably because I was utterly spent from having written a 155K+ manuscript and not taking the proper time to R E S T, but whatever. I was in it, trying to seize on the momentum I’d been building up all year long.

But as June continued to progress further and further, I found myself struggling to put words to the page. So I paused and created a beat sheet. And then another for a totally different project which I am calling Project Truth. And in doing so, I was back on track (or so I thought) and resumed showing up each morning to write.

Yet something still felt off. Everything felt forced. And sometimes, that happens. Somedays, I do have to force myself to sit down and eek out only 300 words, or one paragraph, or one sentence. Anything to show myself that I showed up and put in the work. But usually that only lasts for a day, at most two. And then I’ll wake up and feel the fire burning and the scenes forming in my head and the excitement to sit down and figure this sh*t out.

That wasn’t happening at all in June. If anything, the feelings of dragging my feet only continued to get worse. Which might explain why, in the entire month, I only managed to write 3.5 chapters in book #2 for a total of 13, 623 words.

I had a feeling my word count was going to be around that even before I calculated the numbers. And it’s certainly disappointing, but now that we are nearly halfway through July and I am looking back at it, this low output makes a lot of sense.

Like. . . I finished an entire novel in May! And then immediately jumped into trying to write another one in June?! Of course my output was way less! I’ve been writing non-stop since January! My brain needed a break and was telling me that by gently switching off the power, making me dread my morning writing sessions when I used to adore them, and blocking my creativity.

I’ve got another vlog ready and waiting for you, focused entirely on these ups and downs and round and rounds of June. Feel free to check it out and watch as I quickly forget what I am even doing from one week to the next.

What I’m focusing on next

I am taking note of the lessons June’s struggle to write brought me. I am listening to what it is my brain and body are asking of me and refusing to push myself past the brakes that are so clearly in play. Which looks like me, not having written a single word since the start of July. It also looks like me utilizing my morning time (because I am still waking somewhere between 6:30-7:00 A.M. every morning) to journal instead, and I count that as keeping up my writing practice, too. It looks like switching my brain over to concrete, more analytical parts of my business and implementing structures and foundations long overdue.

Will I return to writing?

Of course I will. But at this moment, on July 9th at 10:13 A.M. as I sit in my office watching the light and shadow dance across my desk in a truly breathtaking way and write this post, I don’t foresee adding anything to Project Magic in July. The urge has not returned. If anything, this momentary pause has me reevaluating the direction of the first half of the story, and not in a bad way. It’s exposing holes in the narrative I’ve noticed before. It’s allowing me the mental space to turn questions over about how to address these holes before they grow bigger in the second half of the story.

And, most importantly, this time is allowing me to tend to the areas of my life I willingly neglected for the past 6 months in favor of pouring all of my energy into this story. Im rediscovering passions I thought were long gone. I am learning how to properly R E S T. And I am taking care of my physical health, which was showing a steady decline, especially when spending days and days bent over a computer screen.

So, you may find me back here at the end of July with a little update on writing, if any gets done. Or you might not. But I promise I will be back eventually. Perhaps in the fall, or maybe deep winter. This story wants to be told and I am excited to tell it. But I also need to honor my pace and not rush through the process because the process truly is the most magical part of it all.

And I am ready to savor every moment of it.